Karmic Soul Mates and Codependent Relationships

We encounter a lot of souls in all our incarnations. All of them have one purpose, which is to help us learn and evolve. However, oftentimes, we experience that learning may not come as smoothly or as easily as we want. We find ourselves in very unsettling, confusing and chaotic relationships and we wonder what we have done to deserve them. We always struggle in the process.

When we do encounter such relationships, we often encounter a karmic soul mate. I often call them “Spiritual classmates.” We have them in our lives because we have left some issues unresolved and perhaps even refuse to learn lessons these relationships bring. And so, we never manage to break the cycle or “graduate’ to the next level.  Until we learn our lessons, we will keep encountering them in our different incarnations.

Karmic soul mates are not confined to romantic relationships but could also present themselves within the family, friends or sometimes, even strangers. Their purpose, oftentimes unbeknownst to them, is to teach us significant lessons that have a great bearing to our long term karmic development.

Let me digress a bit.

I have mentioned in the previous episode, that we also often mistake a karmic soul mate as a twin flame encounter. I really wonder why that happens.

There are many different beliefs about twin flame and soul mates.

But I encourage everyone not just to assume and base the meaning solely on what we read and hear. Try to listen to our spirit, connect with our higher self, then we will be shown the kind of relationship we are encountering at a given moment.

A soul mate can be one who we journey through life together (companion), perhaps growing spiritually side by side or one who would bring chaos to our life but only with the intention of resolving lingering karmic issues (karmic). This kind of soul mate, a karmic soul mate, is often chaotic perhaps because the amount of learning we need to achieve is of great significance compressed within a brief encounter (even a lifetime could be) which is really short.

Having said that, imagine ourselves (for a moment) being given the opportunity to get our most desired dream or goal through completing a task assigned to us. This opportunity comes from a being that can foresee the future and has the power to improve the lives of those it encounters, on one condition, that we pass the test given.

Let’s think of a grand dream. Let’s go for the winning numbers to the lottery worth 20 million dollars! Imagine all the people we can help with that amount of money!

Now let us talk about the task we need to do in exchange for the winning numbers. Let’s imagine the task of learning a full edition of a terra encyclopaedia, full of wisdom and facts new to us, but those that govern the world we live in and could provide such a mastery of life!  There about 12 volumes, each having 700 pages, that we need to learn  in a month!  After which we will be given a test to check the scope of knowledge we have learned in month’s time.

If we pass the test, then we get the winning numbers, not to mention the secrets to life’s mastery!

I’m sure it’ll push us to the edge giving us terrible headaches, nervousness and even dread from the amount of information to learn, digest and retain. We could break from the pressure of fear of failing the test and missing the great opportunity, thereby failing ourselves, with no one else to blame. And because such opportunity is rare and generous, we need to do it. We must do it if we seriously want to achieve our dream!

Well, a karmic soul mate is similar. We need to learn and retain very significant lessons in such a brief encounter, to prepare us for an even greater challenge or a precious reward that would require a certain degree of spiritual maturity for us to accomplish or appreciate.

Now talking about chaotic karmic relationships, as humans, we would end up loathing these souls who had given us such a hard time and much great heartache. But as spirits, we will always be grateful to have encountered them because they helped us grow and moved closer to reuniting with our twin flame and our creator! If we are spiritually enlightened, to a degree, we will have the strength, patience and faith to believe that everything happens for a reason that in the end, we will always come out of a challenge wiser, stronger and more empowered.

We need to realise that when we talk about soul mates, they do not only pertain to the airy-fairy, lovey-dovey stuff, but in fact, it is a strong presence in our lives and we encounter them every day, in every way. If you wonder how, perhaps you should think about your most annoying colleagues at work, maybe your difficult and moody boss, your unbearable mother-in-law, your annoying neighbour or unreasonable customer or client. Quite stereo-typical, isn’t it?  When we find ourselves refusing to leave our comfort zones, pretty soon, we will encounter one.

An encounter with a karmic soul mate is a wakeup call from the Universe, telling us that

  • we are on the brink of stagnation,
  • we are being so stubborn and refuse to learn and improve ourselves
  • or we are soon going to be entrusted with such a precious gift.

Hence some spiritual exercises are required.

But sometimes, the time and the way we do things to correct such karmic cycle is not right. We become stubborn in trying to make things work, the way we want to or think is best.  If this happens in a relationship, then there is a tendency for it to be oppressive and could even bring about co-dependencies.

Karmic Soul mates, Codependent Relationship
Codependent Relationship

Co-depencies is a term originally use for people living with alcoholics and drug dependents, with regard to the way they react, behave and respond to their partners’ behaviour and  environment,  brought about  by their partners’ condition .

But now, its definition has changed into a more expansive one. The most obvious symptoms of a co-dependent relationship are the presence of oppression, any form of abuse, the obsession and compulsion to stay in the very unhealthy relationship and environment, hoping to make it right.

A co-dependent relationship also happens when only one of the partners is so keen on fixing the problem. They do everything in their power to make things right at the expense of their own well-being. They think that if they keep trying, they can save, heal, or be able to show the other the way to deliverance.  For the person who keeps giving, he or she is misguided by his or her desire to take on the role of the saviour or nurturer. He or she unfortunately puts more importance on this false hope, the relationship and the other person, than his or her own well-being.

Sometimes when we come across such a relationship, we need to acknowledge that the lesson we need to learn,  is actually not mending it or making it work, but of letting it go.

By being subjected to constant pain and anguish, oppression and heartache, we are really not learning the right lessons. Remaining in such a continuous dysfunctional state can actually harm and destroy our spirit. Which means, it would take us more time to correct the wrong we have done to ourselves,  through our own stubbornness and neglect.

Think about it.

And I shall leave you with these quotes to ponder.

The consequences of our actions take hold of us quite indifferent to our claim that meanwhile we have “improved”. – Friedrich Nietzsche

From the book “If Life is a Game, These are the Rules.” (Written by Cherie Carter-Scott, Ph.D., the “rules” have also appeared in “Chicken Soup for the Soul” by Jack Canfield.)

The Ten Rules for Being Human
1. You will receive a body.
2.  You will be presented with lessons.
3.  There are no mistakes, only lessons.
4.  Lessons are repeated until learned.
5.  Learning does not end.
6.  “There” is no better than “here”.
7.  Others are only mirrors of you.
8.  What you make of your life is up to you.
9.  All the answers lie inside of you.
10.  You will forget all of this at birth.

by TAROTZAMM – Karmic Soul Mates & Codependent Relationships – Connections – Mystical Junction Episode 2 Excerpt

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